Wednesday, October 19, 2005

You Can Run, But You Can't Hide

Sometimes a line of dialog in a movie will stand out from all the others and become a "theme" of sorts. I'm not good with names of people or titles of movies, but I remember lines. "You can run, but you can't hide." "Make my day." (I think that one slipped from the clenched jaw of Clint Eastwood.)

You might have noticed a lapse in posts for September. It was in part due to problems writing the posts. The letters would all pile up on top of each other as I wrote and I couldn't keep track of what was appearing on the page. Too confusing. I quit trying. But there was another reason--one that almost caused me to delete this blog entirely. The reason--reader comments from guys way too young, and maybe who have nothing better to do than surf the net and drop their lines in the water anywhere, hoping for a bite from ANY female.

I know it's probably harmless. But it's kind of like having a kid younger than my son hitting on me. So here's my line: Don't bother.

I'm writing this because I like the format; and I thought maybe someone out there might enjoy reading about life with an astrological twist. I'm not going to hit the delete button just yet. I'm not going to hide, but make my day, and don't send me your stats.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

AM I AN EMOTIONAL POWDER KEG?

At 11:39 am today, Mars rammed into my Taurus Moon. Shouldn't I be mad about something??
Maybe I'm missing an important piece of information because the most upsetting thing seems to be the trouble I'm hav
ing with the font on this blog. It isn't working right.

I'm not mad at the world, my neighbor, my spouse, my employer, any coworkers, or God. Not today anyway.



Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Taking Stock

Exactly two months ago today, on my birthday, I was at Lolo Hot Springs in Montana. Lewis and Clark were among the earliest visitors to enjoy a brief respite and the hot mineral baths in Montana’s high country in 1805. Long before that, it was a gathering place for Native Americans. I was in Montana with my two daughters and grandson for a gathering of friends and family to celebrate an aunt and uncle’s 50th wedding anniversary.

At the anniversary celebration, one by one, the couple’s children, their sons-in-law, and several friends stood and became the center of attention for a brief, anxiety-ridden moment, so they could express their love and appreciation for the couple. One daughter said, “Thank you for still being together and for always loving each other.” Another said, “Thank you, Mom, for being at home; and to you, Dad, for always supporting us.” One son-in-law said, “Thank you for always being there for us, and for never telling us what to do.”

What they said seemed so commonplace, even a little hokey by some measures of success. When my aunt and uncle pass over, their obituaries will list family members, but the list of accomplishments—signs of success—will be absent. But wait a minute. Shouldn’t this couple and their long marriage be deemed successful? How many couples do you know who have been married 50 years? Happily? How many couples have adult children who still REALLY like them? And are those children still married after 25 years? To his or her first spouse? The odds are against saying yes to one of these questions, let alone saying yes to all of them.

The transiting Sun makes a sextile to my Sun, today. It’s a checkpoint in the cycle from birthday to birthday—a day to take stock, to see how far I’ve come. There’s just one problem--I forgot to set goals for what I want or expect for myself in the coming year. Darn!

Fortunately, all is not lost. I can still take advantage of this checkpoint. My natal Sun is on the cusp of the fourth house, so the transiting Sun brings my creativity, my children, and how I’m feeling about love into focus. How do these things stack up? Well, I’m working on a novel and feeling pretty good about the way it’s developing. My adult kids are busy with their own lives, and they still like to come home to visit and tell me about what is going on in their lives. I’ve only given one piece of unsolicited advice to my son this week. My seventh-grader is happy and thinking about what her college major will be. And, it’s becoming clearer to me with each passing day that love is what will KEEP the world turning.

Today dawned sunny and warm—perfect weather for attending the State Fair, which is in full swing. (I’m waiting until the weekend to indulge in the best people watching, lemonade, and corndogs in the state, though.) The neighbor’s linden trees are dropping butter yellow leaves on my driveway. We’re on in the cusp of a waning summer with its warm days and those cool nights that hold the promise of autumn.

The next checkpoint comes in thirty days, when the Sun squares my Sun. Hmmm. I wonder what will be happening then?

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

I had an opportunity in July to work with someone I admire, and this opportunity came with the added bonus of some serious cash. How could I refuse? I felt a little out of my comfort zone with the prospect of ghost writing, but pushing the envelope was, I thought, a good mental exercise. Stretching for a higher bar would expose my limits and push me to try harder. So I sent off a sample of my work for her review. She "loved it," and I started writing.

I worked really hard to do a good job, but as I sent in the first of two parts I had a "feeling" that it was not going to be viewed as 100 percent satisfactory. She made some editorial comments, though nothing out of the ordinary, and I pushed on. I'm an editor in my day job, so I know first-hand how material can vary when it comes in. Editorial decisions can be subjective at times, too. In this instance, my editor would turn out to be highly subjective--after the fact.


On August 5, the day after the new moon, I prepared an invoice, and after checking the calendar to make sure the moon wasn't void-of-course, I dropped my invoice and a return envelop in the mail. (I didn't want my effort to have a different outcome than I expected, which could have been the result if the moon was void. I expected and wanted to be paid.) A couple of days later I told my husband a check for $1000 was coming and I wanted to use it for one of our home projects. From our long list, we narrowed the possiblilities to two: purchasing a garden shed we need for storage or replacing the boards on our backyard deck. We could have snow on the ground here in Minnesota in less than seventy days, so storage for summer things--the patio furniture, a lawnmower, and our bikes--seemed like the obvious choice. While the money wouldn't cover the whole cost, it would pay a substantial portion of it, so I started looking online for a garden shed I liked.

The Virgo moon squared my third house Gemini Mars on Monday, August 8. This transit has a temporary effect that lasts only a few hours and may pass by with little impact at all. On the other hand, it may result in irritable or defensive feelings. If the transit stirs up some kind of action, however, a dispute will likely to be the result. This transit would turn out to be the "low-light" of my day.

I recieved an e-mail from her on Monday afternoon. Would I consider a kill fee and 50 percent of the money? She added that she'd worked hard to edit the material, and, she was disappointed. In publishing, we pay a kill fee to keep something out of print. My material had already been published by the time she made her request. I checked the time she had sent her e-mail. The moon had been void-of-course for several hours!

I felt bad for about thirty seconds. Then I hit the reply button on her e-mail and said no, I would not accept a reduction in payment. It seemed to me that if what I submitted wasn't what she expected or wanted, she should have said so BEFORE she used the materials. It was too late as far as I was concerned. She sent a second e-mail in which she agreed to pay the full amount, but she wasn't done. She insulted me. I responded with a "Thank you," and let it go at that.

As the moon finished its passage through Virgo on Monday, it passed by my natal Saturn in the late degrees of that sign. I realized as I refused her request (Saturn and the moon) that I wouldn't get another opportunity from her, but I felt okay. She had tried to bully me and I didn't appreciate it. I had stood my ground and said what I needed to say (Mars in the third house of communication).

I'll buy the garden shed when the check arrives in the mail. I expect that will happen the week of August 15, after Mercury is direct and when the moon is becoming full to reveal what was started during the new moon.